The Power Of Yes!

I wanted to chat with you quick about what you are saying yes to and how this may be causing  you to feel burned out.  Burn out to me is when you are feeling spread to thin!  If you are pulled in too many directions, you can’t be great at anything.  

Just picture this, you get home from the office, your kids are crying, dog is barking, your wife or husband is asking you to help with something, but you still have 100 emails to answer and appointments to prep for tomorrow, you are starving, haven’t drank enough water all day and didn’t have time to hit the gym……….Now I am not saying ditch your family, they are too much work. I am saying….maybe you need to re-evaluate and learn the power of saying yes to yourself before saying yes to everyone else.  Learning how this can help you be more present in your personal life and stop this feeling of overwhelm.  

This was something I struggled with for a really long time. It is actually still something I work on daily. Thankfully after some practice I have much better habits in place now, however it was not always that way. There was a long portion of my life where I never wanted to let anyone down.  I wanted to please those around me and I often did it at the expense of my own health both physically and mentally.  

There came a point in my life where I found I didn’t have time to take care of myself and do the things I loved.  At this point my coach helped me learn the power of saying yes and being very clear on what I was saying yes to.  I remember her telling me that when you say yes to someone or something else you are saying no to yourself and that hit home for me.  

I began working on asking myself a series of questions prior to saying yes to things both in my personal life and work life.  Rather than just quickly saying yes and figuring it out later.  (which is what I always use to do) 

So let’s dive into what I actually do before saying yes to things.  It is important to stop saying yes to things that are not serving you. When something comes up for me that I have to make a decision on Here are the questions I ask myself.  

1)   Is this opportunity important to me?  Does it excited me, or am I saying yes because I know it will make someone else happy?

2)   Is this opportunity something that I have been looking for in my life?

3)   When I look at my schedule does adding this in feel good or increase my stress level?

Pausing to ask yourself these questions is very important.  When we take the time to do this we will find that our schedules are filled with things that bring us joy instead of things we think we are supposed to be doing.    

I also love using some different essential oils when I am trying to change my mindset around saying yes to things and especially when I am trying to gain confidence to say no to things. Here are some of my favorite oils I use!

Balance: I use this essential oil on the bottoms of my feet every morning to help with grounding, courage and self confidence

Motivate: I love reaching for this oil when I am need the courage or confidence to say no to something

Passion: This blend is great when I am wanting to follow my passion and my purpose

Frankincense: A great oil for self confidence, I apply a drop over my heart or even a drop under my tongue to help me with confidence and stand strong in my decision.

Remember that every time you say yes to something or someone else you are saying no to yourself.  This is very important.  Now I do not recommend being rude when saying no to people or telling your boss no because you do not like a project.  There are some things in life we have to say yes to, however there are A LOT of things in our lives that we say yes to that we do not have to.  

I had a client I was working who came to me saying she needed more energy she was always tired. I helped her with some essential oils to support sleep and energy, but she was still tired….so we dove in deeper. Turns out she really didn’t know how to say no.  She was on every board, said yes to every classroom volunteer project etc etc but she never said yes to herself and she felt overwhelmed all the time.  Through some work together, learning to pause before saying yes to things and accountability she now feels empowered to say yes to herself first and say no without feeling guilty.  She now has a schedule she can manage and feels like she can show up as the best version of herself each and every day.  

‘You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage- pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically – to say ‘no’ to other things.  And the way to do that is by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside.’ Steven Covey

Want to connect and learn more about the power of no? Click HERE to schedule a call with me!